How Can Workplaces Identify + Reduce Domestic Violence?

We speak to Jess Hill (Australian journalist behind ‘See What You Made Me Do’), Lisa McAdams (Founder of Safe Space Workplace) and Delia Donovan (CEO of DV NSW) on how to identify and support people experiencing coercive control and domestic violence.

JESS HILL

Australian journalist + author of
‘See What You Made Me Do’

“I REMEMBER ONE WOMAN WHO’S KNOWN AS J - IT’S TOO DANGEROUS TO BE KNOWN BY HER NAME"

"Her ex-partner was a Victorian police officer and was the first cop to be charged in five years. The violence against her was physical, as can so often be a part of coercive control – but the coercive control was extremely intense towards her and her kids.

She’s been a strategic mastermind – firstly of surviving it, and secondly of informing Victoria Police to actually prosecute perpetrators within the force. But through his manipulation and gaslighting, she came to believe that it was her fault that he was treating her and the kids like that, because she hadn’t managed his PTSD properly. She had even developed a safety plan for her children, but not for herself – she thought that if she ended up being murdered, she only had herself to blame.

This process of thought reform means that leaving is a very long process. For those supporting the people leaving, be it colleagues, friends, family – it can be very frustrating. You can feel like you‘ve said the same thing 20, 30, 40 times…to the point where you just don't feel like you can say it anymore.

But J said her manager and her colleagues (most of whom were male) saved her life. Because they understood that leaving was not an event; that leaving was a process. The way that they would make her safe was to ask her explicit questions like, “Are you safe at home?” or  “Why is your partner so paranoid?”, “Why does he come to the office demanding to look through your bin?”.

They would say, “If you're not here at 9 a.m. for a morning coffee every morning, then we're going to call 000” – they could tell she was unsafe. Finally, it was the actions of her manager who literally got her to safety, that stopped her and her kids from being killed when things got extremely risky.

So I think that Domestic Violence policies are godsend, partly because they indicate that the workplace has an interest in this. But her colleagues didn't wait for her to disclose. They could see the bruises under her makeup, and they made it known that they could see that. But they modelled a kind of love and respect that she was not getting at home.

“They built her back up, piece by piece – that's what helped her leave.”

That is a really important example of that unconditional love and support that is so essential. I think often, when we want to support someone at work, we might want to take a bit of control – but that's not always the best approach. Unconditional support and safety planning is key.”

- JESS HILL

LISA MCADAMS

Founder of Safe Space Workplace

“THE FIRST THING IS, YOU'VE GOT TO START TALKING ABOUT IT.”

“And that  starts with respect. If you're allowing people to be belittled, if you don't have a respectful work environment, then you can’t talk about it. You've got to create an environment which models respect and equity, so you can talk about DV.

Businesses are doing the bare minimum to support. If you're not talking about your policies, if you’re not encouraging people to take leave, or encouraging people to feel safe, then nothing's going to happen.

Big companies are using working groups for workplace DV support, asking employees to use their own time outside of their job to implement these things. They churn and burn their advocates; somebody's passionate and starts the process, but two years on, they're burnt out and we start again with someone new.

I am going to change workplaces one leader at a time. I can't do it from the outside, but I can equip the ones on the inside with my knowledge.”

- LISA MCADAMS

DELIA DONOVAN

CEO of DV NSW

1. All workplaces can be part of important changes to their culture by promoting gender equality, safety and respect. Challenge the drivers of violence – call out disrespect, harmful comments and behaviours, and act on it. This is a good resource to check out.
2. Have resources that communicate local Domestic + Family Violence services, and men’s referral services, in bathrooms and common areas.
3. Provide Domestic + Family Violence training to all staff, not just management. Commonly, people experiencing D+FV will disclose to a close colleague, rather than a line manager.
4. Provide other alternatives to just line manager and/or HR reps for people to disclose - for instance, training Wellbeing Champions on responding to disclosures, so they know where and how to refer someone to support services.
5. Recognise changes in employee behaviour, productivity and general wellbeing – experiencing coercive control and Domestic + Family Violence impacts self-esteem and self-worth.
6. Understand that perpetrators could be using workplace equipment (computers, phones) to perpetrate violence, and have policies in place to respond to this.